Fitness Files: 10 Uncensored Thoughts from a Morning Spin Class

1. This is great! I’m here, I’m pumped, let’s do this!

2. What do you mean it’s only been ten minutes?

3. Does Beyonce surf? Why is she singing about a surfboard?

4. Not another “hill.”

5. You did this to me, Nutella pizza.

6. I really hope this class is almost over.

7. Do all spin instructors sing in class? Are all NYC spin instructors hoping to be discovered by a Broadway producer?

8. I wonder if Starbucks will deliver to the gym?

9. Jake Gyllenhaal met an ex-girlfriend during a spin class. Maybe that will happen to me? We could dance round the kitchen in the refrigerator light, drive a new Maserati down a dead-end street, drink maple lattes together, and do other things I’ll remember all too well.

10. I’m done!!! This was great!! Best day ever!!!